How COOK COUNTY Ruined My New Year and Sent Me Spiraling Into a Deep Dark Chasm of DEPRESSION From Which I Will Never Recover From, So Now I Seek REVENGE or the Equivalent of Adequate FINANCIAL Compensation to Wrap a Warm Blankie Around My Emotional SCARS

. . .

Yes.  If you enlarge the image to read the name highlighted in neon-green, that is indeed my mom.

She's apparently been summoned for Jury Duty.

It's kind of funny.  On the back of the summons form they ask you all these specific questions like "Are you a citizen of the United States?" and "Have you ever been convicted of a crime?", but they never seem to ask the all-too-important ones like

"Are you amongst

the LIVING??????"

. . .

Curious as to her reaction, I went down to the cemetery to talk to my mom about whether or not she'd be up to the task of fulfilling her civic duty in her current condition, and as expected she immediately made me call the Cook County Circuit Court so she could speak her mind.

The conversation went a little bit like this:  

   
     
If your web browser doesn't allow you to see or play the embeddable player that holds this conversation, please click here for a direct download.